Th' expense of spirit in a waste of shameIs lust in action, and till action, lustIs perjur'd, murd'rous, bloody, full of blame,Savage, extreme, rude, cruel, not to trust,Enjoy'd no sooner but despisèd straight,Past reason hunted, and no sooner had,Past reason hated as a swallowed baitOn purpose laid to make the taker mad. . . .(shakespeare)
"Man's demise lye in his loins, while his heart has bounds, his mind has none". (priest)
Anyway you look at it, the whole sleeping with Fancy thing was not a great idea, not blaming her and not crucifying myself either, just saying at that moment in time I was already trudging down a path of utter confusion may as well make Jim's folly complete.
Ok so we are just about halfway thru with this, should we continue....oh sure why not.
We went to see the Greg Adams Band back at Spaghettini, great show..I have know Greg since way back in the Tower of Power days before he was a grammy winner, so when they play around his wife calls and asks if I want to come, Fancy thought this was really cool...giant name card on our table..the band acknowleding their friends in the crowd. She was chair dancing, I asked her if she wanted to dance and she was to embarrased because no one else was...like who cares, you either want to dance or not, am I wrong? Is everyone really watching and if they are what do they do with the information.
I am sure there were some less eventful dates in between, I afterall at this point was in a "Relationship" fully commited to do whatever it was that I had no idea of what it was that I was doing, or something like that.
Fancy's Birthday was right around the corner, I thought it would be nice to take her somewhere, nothing to crazy its only been like 6 weeks at this point. So I invited her to spend her Birthday weekend with me at the Surf and Sand, we would eat at Splashes get massages trot around Laguna, maybe shop...you get the idea, a really relaxing weekend, sounds like fun right. So I call and ask her and SHE loves the idea, I book it and we are on. The next day she calls me and says that she changed her mind, she wants to cook and have her kids over for dinner. I told her that was fine with me afterall its was her birthday. I told her that I would come over and take her out to dinner for her Birthday on Friday....oh no she said, I want you to meet my kids...ah oh, that sounds a um uh great.....much better than the Surf and Sand thing.
Sunday was her actual birthday...so I went over on Friday Night and threw a little surprise party, I don't need adult children of Fancy Nancy's stealing my thunder. I brought a movie "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with me, dinner from the Wild Artichoke where we had dined for our first real dinner date...I also brought a flourless chocolate cake, a day pass to Spa Gregory, Teuscher's Truffles and a card, nothing to sappy just a cute card.. She was very happy with her gifts as evidence that I graduated from the guest room that night.
I looked around trying to figure out what the big deal was, why we didn't come up here the last time, its nice...hey why is the dog in here? I am not sure about anyone else, but I don't do dogs in the bedroom unless sleeping is the only thing going on. Call me dogophobic or whatever but just not going down that road...no I am not thank you very much, I ended up letting Lilly out of the room on several occasiosn between then and morning, kept wandering how she was getting back in....I think FANCY would have been just fine with her in the room(creeped me out a bit). I even got up and made us breakfast in the morning, she had some odd combinations of food in the fridge but enough to put together some feta omlettes with tomatoe and clamata olives..yum I love that combo.
I was starting to feel more comfortable with the situation, not so much internal struggling going on in my head, but still something was missing(hmm), I wasn't going to worry about...at least not for now. Why rock the boat right.
The Birthday Roses were delivered on Saturday....she called and thanked me....asked me to come up a little earlier on Sunday if I could and help her get everything ready.. I agreed afterall it was her birthday why should she be doing all the prep.
When I got there her son Robert was sleeping on the couch, or sort of sleeping, nice that he could help her I thought. She made Chicken Parmesean, it was edible, that is all I am saying I made a cesear salad...Her daughter Jennifer arrived and started chruning out the "Cosmo's". Oh its a family thing I guess. Shortly after Jennifer's friend arrived, we had dinner and the kids made sport of Nancy the entire time, it verged on embarrasing, not sure what my place in this was so mildly uncomfortable. I popped the champagne that I brought and it took the edge off a bit.
Dinner mercifully ended, we did the cake that Nancy had made for herself...sheesh great kids. They left right after giving there mother a group gift, WTF is that about I thought...it wasn't like they pitched in and bought her a house or something...
I helped with the dishes, and she told me all about how rough her breakup with the father had been on the kids and that they still resented it a bit. I asked her when that was and she told me 20 years ago...(WHAT??) hmmmmm....I knew she had been divorced 5 years prior....I gotta start paying better attention. I need to call Hanna and get some better intel...
Still I ploded on, there is something to be said for having a comfort level established...not sure why that might be but we do tend to get used to what we have and that in some from is comfortable...